Rage
by Irrelevancy
Summary: Because Gray was the only one who understood Natsu after Lisanna's death. NatsuGray. Rated M for pseudo-rape, and violence.


****

**A/N: When it comes down to it, the Fairy Tail fandom seriously lacks Natsu/Gray fics...**

**Or maybe that's just because I've read them all. :P**

**So I bring you this... Angstfest supreme. I haven't even read this over, since I'm afraid I'll be too depressed.**

**It is a tad lemony though~ Be warned~**

**Disclaimer: Fairy Tail belongs to Hiro Mashima-san, whom I clearly am. I mean, why would I be drawing this all out, if I was, when I could be posting this on ffn?  
**

* * *

When Natsu gets mad, he always has to take his anger out on something. It didn't mattered what, and sometimes who. He needed a source to vent his frustrations out on, and when it comes down to it, nearly everything within 500-meters radius will be burnt to a crisp. For example, that one night in Arabia, when petty thieves stole his hard-won dinner. Or at the town of Cynthia, when the girls decided to all fawn over Gray. And there was always that time in Balsam town, when Gray's well-aimed pillows smacked him in the face one too many times.

The time with Lisanna was different.

It was different, because he didn't know he was mad. Or rather, Natsu couldn't come to terms with the fact that he was mad. People didn't get mad when their close friend just died. They had to be sad. All of them. Even the skies cried for a dismally long period of time.

Natsu couldn't get mad. If he did, he knew the person he'd take it all out on was Elfman, and the mage had enough to worry about already, what with murdering his beloved sister with his own hands.

So for six days, Natsu sulked. For the whole six days, nobody laughed, nobody smiled. Heck, hardly anyone_ talked_. The atmosphere was simply too heavy for that. Suffocating and thick, like being thrown in a vat of mud, sinking into the mix, feeling it all contract around you, strangling you, and losing sight and any sense of feeling; which way was up, which way was down, Natsu no longer knew.

He was drowning in his own emotions.

Natsu wanted to yell, but didn't know if he could. Natsu wanted to break things, but didn't know if he could. Natsu wanted to cry.

He knew for sure he couldn't.

On the seventh day, Gray came back. When he walked through the doors, the flame mage turned to face him. Natsu watched as those stone-colored eyes sweep across the gloomy room, landing on Mirajane with her arms around herself, and Elfman, whose eyes seemed permanently frozen wide in shock. Finally, those eyes came back to meet his own, and suddenly, Natsu was filled with indescribable rage. He didn't know why, didn't understand why, but just knew that seeing the ice mage pissed him off beyond belief.

At least, that's what he thought.

Gray knew why.

The ice mage had received the shocking news before he left for the mission, actually, but understood, through experience, that Mirajane and Elfman didn't need other people around them, didn't need the pity of other people to oppress them. The siblings needed each other, and only each other could help. Gray's presence wasn't needed back in the Fairy Tail guild.

Or so he thought. He wasn't omnipotent. He didn't realize just how confused Natsu would be about these new sentiments. He didn't realize Natsu would need him.

But now, it was obvious the flame mage needed help, and Gray could only lend him a hand his own way. Fortunately, it was the most effective way to calm Natsu down, and suppress his burning anger.

"Lisanna's dead."

With the simple two words, Gray shattered the foolish silence that permeated every inch of Fairy Tail; not just the guild, but everyone in it. He shattered the mirror that Mirajane and Elfman stood in front of to deceive themselves of reality, always looking back at the image of the long-gone Lisanna. Most importantly, he shattered the circle of cold, cold fire that burned around Natsu's heart, and woke everyone from this deadening trance.

Natsu charged forward at him, fists flaming, with a desperate yell. Later on, Gray would tell himself that he let the flame mage's fist connect with the side of his face, but deep down, he knew his own actions had startled himself to some degree, and he couldn't recover from the shock fast enough to dodge Natsu's attack. The ice mage's body flew through the air, out the door, and landed in the dirt. Momentum carried him a couple of yards down, and Gray could feel ripping flesh and dripping blood, then numbing nerves. Shakily he stood up to face his worst enemy, and at the same time, his best friend, face to face. Natsu was mad. He wasn't mad at Gray, but all the same, he was mad.

And when Natsu got mad, he always had to take his anger out on someone.

This time, both mage charged forward with a battle cry, but Gray had been weakened considerably on the self-appointed A-class mission. His ice was nowhere up to par with Natsu's flames of rage, and he could only manage pathetic shields as he retreated further and further down the street from Natsu's blasts. From his peripherals, Gray knew they were nearing the flame mage's apartment. This was good. Natsu was surprisingly protective of his living place, and wouldn't use all these up-scale attacks on Gray near his home.

Then the inevitable happened. Like Venice, Fiore had waterways for transportation. A thin stream ran through the narrow street where Natsu's apartment resided. A particularly strong blast of fire sent Gray's balance teetering, and a wrong step sent him into the ice-cold stream. Natsu, blind to everything but the assumed source of his anger, jumped right in with the ice mage, and managed to evaporate a good part of the water around him as he towered above the panting Gray.

The heat in those eyes turned into a different kind all together.

Natsu still wanted to hurt Gray, still wanted to burn him, to hate him, to blame him for everything that's wrong in his life, but he wanted to do it in a different way now. He wanted to break the ice mage, make him his, make him beg, humiliate him, and make sure he never lives it down.

In his angered state of mind, the flame mage pounced, straddling Gray and focused all of his attacks onto the flailing body below him. For being in such a weak condition, Gray put up quite the fight. Natsu wasn't unscathed when he finally held a near-unconscious Gray up by the neck and dragged him up to his room. He wasn't unscathed when he slammed Gray down onto his bedside table instead of the mattress. He wasn't unscathed when he started attacking Gray's lips with his own, biting and chewing and pulling and tugging.

When the ice mage let out a sound of surprise beneath him, Natsu bit down. Hard. He heard Gray hiss in pain, and bit down some more, evidently enjoying the agony he brought him.

Gray, being Gray, was already in a convenient state of undress. All Natsu had to do was tug down those annoying jeans that hung dangerously low on slim hips along with the dark gray boxers, and the ice mage was completely exposed to him.

Gray kicked up, catching the smug Natsu on the back of his head, making the flame mage stumble back, eyes daring and challenging. But at that moment, Gray couldn't care less. He had to get a grasp on the situation before him. Only expecting a huge brawl, the ice mage hadn't anticipated this. And Natsu… It wasn't hard to understand his mentality, but it _was_ accepting it. Sure, Gray wanted to help, but he didn't know if he was willing to give this much just to quell the fire that didn't belong in Natsu.

But clearly, what he thought didn't matter. Having recovered from the kick, the flame mage returned it in a well-placed blow to the left of Gray's head. It was a direct hit to his temple, and left the ice mage seeing stars when he crashed into the standard wooden kitchen table. A thick splinter pierced through his side, and Natsu didn't help matters by landing on him and shoving him deep down onto the sharp piece of wood. Gray yelped in pain, but received no mercy as Natsu began his attack on Gray's lips again. This time, though, his ravaging escalated to the inside of the ice mage's mouth also. Gray tried to bite down, but Natsu always seemed to get there before him. Before long, Gray could feel a trail of blood sliding down his chin and down his likewise bleeding torso. A warm tongue slithered its way down along the path and to a dampened nipple, massaging, pressing, then biting it harshly before giving its twin the same treatment. A gasp escaped from between bloodied lips as Gray's fists rained down on the flame mage's back.

"Natsu-! Shit- stop it! Stop it right- oh FUCK!"

Natsu smirked when the ice mage's back arched from the pleasure of a particularly good combination of teeth and hands, for the dragon slayer's hand had found its way to Gray's member, and gave it a good hard pump. He could feel the sensitive mage beneath him tremble and harden instantly at the heat of his hands, and rewarded Gray with a light flick to the underside of his cock.

The ice mage shivered at the foreign touches, melting instantly in Natsu's hands. When the flame mage picked him up, all he wanted to do was to curl into the embrace, the heat…

But the heat… The alien fire that wasn't supposed to burn within Natsu… Gray had to get rid of it. No sense of reason existed to tell him why, just that he had to, and Gray planned to follow that order to the end.

So he struggles. He didn't know if he was just acting, or he really wanted out. All he knew was that struggle was good, since it gave Natsu what he wanted; and like a child, when Natsu got what he wanted, he'd be happy again.

If struggling could make Natsu happy, then the ice mage would struggle.

The flame mage completely ignored Gray's futile attempts to escape from his grasp, and dumped him quite unceremoniously on the bed. The splinter at his side fell and rolled off the side, and at once, blood started to puddle. Natsu almost tsked at his dirtied sheets, but the trembling mage provided would provide much more entertainment than washing laundry. So he crawls up and leans over Gray, arms and legs caging him in as the dragon slayer leered down, and whispered.

Gray didn't know what he whispered, but it made him cry.

It seemed like a promise, the gruff way he breathed the words, with flames engraved into every syllable. It also seemed like pain, the way Natsu's teeth bared as he spoke the words into the ice mage's ears. Nonsensical pledges assured Gray of his fate at Natsu's hands, and he wasn't afraid to admit he cried, just a little bit.

He wasn't afraid to, but he was definitely ashamed.

What happened after that was all a blur. A surreal, painful blur of wandering in and out of the realm of unconsciousness. The squelching of blood, the impossibly fulfilling heat and the pain it brought, and the light-headedness at the loss of blood… Everything seemed like an ephemeral dream.

Funny. Gray thought ephemeral things were supposed to be beautiful. This particular memory made him want to cry, puke, and break something all at the same time. For Gray, this was the most painful, most humiliating night of his life.

The irony was, Natsu didn't even remember.

When Natsu finally became exhausted enough to fall asleep, pain kept the ice mage up. He remembered staring at Natsu for a good long time – it could've been an hour, it could've been two seconds; all his sense of time had disappeared along with the moon behind a dark cloud – wondering what to do. One part of him wanted to murder Natsu, for daring to do something like that to him. But the dominating part of him persuaded the other side that Yes, this is what Gray wanted. When Natsu wakes up, Lisanna would still be dead, but Natsu would be able to look at it now. Natsu would be able to look at it, and accept it as it is. The dragon slayer would snap out of his pensive mood, and return to normal.

Just like Gray wanted.

The ice mage finally came to a decision. With a definite limp in his steps, Gray gathered his clothes and slowly dressed himself, wincing at every movement, being especially careful of his still-tender side. Then, he began fixing everything up to the way it was before; wiping the blood from the ground and putting everything back to its place. The table though… the table he couldn't replace. Not now, anyways. So he did the only thing he could, and dragged it with him as he hobbled out the door, and down the steps. Natsu would wake up tomorrow morning, and last night would seem like a passing dream, forgotten by the shine of the sun. Because it surely will be sunny tomorrow. It'd be sunny, because Natsu's moodiness would've gone.

Along with Gray, since it was the norm, after all, for mages to disappear for days on end 'on a mission'.

Natsu would definitely be okay.

**

* * *

**

**A/N: I actually contemplated different endings for this...**

**I mean, there could've been a bit of BDSM involved, and Natsu could've woken up next to Gray, realizing what he's done...**

**But that would've dragged on way longer than it already does.**

**But, I mean, if anyone would like to see that version... *Shrug* By all means, just comment and tell me.**

**When I gather enough confidence, I'll write a sequel, possible~~~**

**Even if you think it sucks so badly it should go to hell, be burnt to crisps, scattered into the ocean, evaporated, then blasted out as jet fuel into the endless universe, please review~!**

EDIT 11/4/10: I HAVE FINISHED THE SEQUEL, AND IT GOES HERE:

http: / / www. fanfiction. net/ s/ 6450865/ 1/


End file.
